Late-night ramblings

Nursing a mild flu, but can't really sleep. I guess it must hve something to do with the fact that I'm on medical leave tomorrow (therefore don't have to work)...can't bear to go to bed. I was on leave the last couple days...since last weds. Guess I didn't treasure the days off, till it's too late. Having flu is no fun, but I guess this flu did in a way, come at a good time. THen again, MCs are usually treasured stuff.

Was just surfing my FB account, after playing my usual restaurant city. Went to look at some friends' photos and stuff...and suddenly thought of some friends whom I haven't heard, or even seen their updates on FB. Not even a tag of their pics or something. So...on impulse, I sent one of such friends, a short message, asking him how he's doing. I guess the last time I "talked" to him (and it was through sms...blame technology I guess) was...last year? or was it at least 2 years back, when he wished me a happy birthday through sms. I don't remember how I responded, but I guess I must have just said thank you, or something polite. Anyway, the thought of him tonight sort of made me recall how we used to talk or went out on dates. But I guess things didn't work out, and to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings, I had decided to cut the communication, to simply hi-byes.

I don't know...was I too callous? We went out a couple of times...He was a nice guy, really..it seemed as though something was going to happen between us. But I guess he was tooooo nice. Not that I want him to be evil or something. But I guess for me, I just have this issue about guys who are too nice, and will-get-bullied sort. (Ask my current bf...that was one of the main reasons I had rejected him years ago..haha..though he may not remember it >.<) Anyways...this guy, he was so nice, he didn't get mad at me at all, even when he'd figured out I was erm...using him. Using him as a substitute, in a way. I had my heart broken by another guy who had commitment issues (talk about the irony), and this guy was there for me. He went out with me when I was bored, talked to me coz I couldn't sleep, spent money on stuff he usually wouldn't (he was quite a thrifty squirrel). Till the point it dawned on me what I was really doing to my life, and his (I swear I had no intention of "playing" him..I had thought him n me would work out). I could still remember vividly what he had told me, when I tried to explain things to him, and apologise. He told me he knew he was only a substitute, and that it was a matter of time before I would realise, and things between us would change. Gawd...the guilt I had felt was so tremendous...I really had nothing to say. I couldn't even bring myself to say sorry now. Coz it felt like sorry would never be enough. I mean, it was like, the guy gave his heart totally, even though he knew we will never be. How I could be so mean, I can't fathom either. I hope he truly finds someone he deserves.

Yup so... ... just wondering how he's doing now.

Bangkok Photos

I'm absolutely in no mood to blog. Well obviously, I'm back in Singapore after a wonderful 2-week holidays. It's depressing to be back in reality, where work and school just dictates every hour, every minute and every second of my life.

Ever since I got back from Aussie land, I've started dreaming again. Eh, I'm refering to the literal dreams, the dreams that bug me at night, every night. Before my trip, I was having dreams, nightmares and what-have-yous every night. During my trip, it was perfect..nothing. No dreams to keep me from a good night's rest. Ever since I stepped onto Sunny Singapore, Ka-boom! You have it - the dreams come to me EVERYNIGHT without fail. Some horrifying, some ridiculous. I just wake up tired, like having not rested. I tell everyone I have the good fortune of "watching" a movie every night. When I sleep that is.

And the stress level is increasing for me, so much so that I feel foolish at the things I do. Last night I poured myself a glass of juice from the fridge, and after a good time sipping it, I washed the glass, and guess what? I proceeded to "return" the glass to the freaking fridge. -.- Another one. I was walking along the Orchard underpass at CK Tangs, where the row of atms are? Opp the ATMs is this panel of wall with a big advert black-&-white. You know what? There was a lady dressed in orange leaning on the wall (presumably waiting for someone), she had her head tilted to the left, and when I walked past the wall, she moved (turned to look in my direction) and I was taken aback. I got a fright (seriously). I thought she was part of the advert, and I thought I was seeing things. -.- And and...this a good one too. I was at Orchard MRT Station popular book store, and when I wanted to catch 190 home, all I could think of was, the bus stop is located behind Wisma. And the unbelievably smart me took the escalator down the mrt station, out to Wisma, cut through Wisma to 3rd level, exited Wisma and towards the bus stop. For all who aren't sure of the location of the freaking bus stop...it's just outside the MRT station. All I needed to do, was to take the escalator UP and OUT to the bus stop. Unbelievable.

Ok enough. I don't want to go on about it. Anyway I ought to get back to my work. I just wanted to upload these photos taken at Bangkok earlier this year with my two pals, Lyn and Audrey. I'll do some commentary next time if I have the time. Haa. Here goes.

Day 1 - On the plane, arrival at the Surva-dunno-what airport, a sumptuous lunch at Siam Paragon (Jap food, the cheap and a lot quantity one), night shopping at a night market (some General's market or dunno what..can't remb now. heh)

This was at the famous Chatuchak market. The place is seriously so big, we barely completed one block from 9am-9pm. Also the time when we re-wrote a record: Shopping for 12-hour straight with only a 1/2hr lunch break. Nope, no toilet breaks too. Are you up to the challenge of shopping with us? Wahahaha..

Saw this interesting advert at the MBK Shopping Mall...can't remember whether they were advertising bras or breast enhancement services. Click on it to see what "type/shape" your boobs are. Wahaha...

Nothing much...just some shops near the hotel we were staying at. Interesting shops. We shopped through the four days, we didn't even do any body or foot massages. Kinda waste huh.

And yes, that's the room the 3 of us bunked in. Messed up by our shopping wares. We hardly had room to move about. What you see is not what you get. There's more stuff not captured in the picture. Wahaha. We stayed in Novotel Siam Square, a really cool place. Definitely well located (in the heart of everything), comfortable, not too ex! The "innocent" me have nv been on a shopping holiday, so I brought 2 small luggages, which hardly was enough obviously. The other 2 girls were way smarter. They brought huge luggages (those that can bring you on a 12-day tour to Europe type), which was empty when we just reached, and packed full by the time we left. Audrey even had to unzip a special pocket in her luggage to give additional space. Smart girl.

Supposedly one of the better delicacies that's cheap and good. Know what this is? Bird's Nest. But hell no, it looks like erm...something tested in the labs...complete with the blue containers. -.- Tasted bad too. Yucks. After which we learnt, we ought to have bought from the neighbouring stall. ~ bummers

Our last breakfast at the hotel before heading to the airport. Nice food. International buffet breakfast, though the variety is a tad disappointing. Oh well. But I love their waffles. They had all kinds of exotic fruits to go with it (take ur pick), and the fruits were fresh and juicy. Fresh pickings I must say. Nice!

At the airport, while waiting for our flight. We decided to pool our resources together and splash all on a nice treat. The girls were nice...they decided to indulge me...ICE CREAM! Yum!

Sadly...it was back to Singapore. A short four-day trip. Certainly not enough. I dislike going for short trips actually. It's like, before you know it, you have to take the flight back. Bummer rite. Well there were more places we visited..but no time to take pictures. haha..But then again, it was a nice trip, spending bonding time and stuff like that, with the girls. We endeavour to go somewhere again soon (dunno how soon also), and hopefully, the other 3 girls can make it too! Cheers!

Let's Be Happy...for now

'Nuff of the depressing stuff for awhile. Let's share some happy news. Or at least good stuff to lighten up my stressed mode.

Hmm, countdown to Australia - 3 days! Much as I've been to Aussie land for quite a number of times, I'm still grateful for this break. Who wouldn't appreciate a holiday huh...though of course, erm, timing is a little tight here. More importantly, I'm spending quality time with my dearest. How not to be happy huh *wide grin* Though...I'll have a small price to pay - bringing my school work there to. Yeah I know. *roll eyes*

Well, whatever it is...I'll take the first Qantas flight out on Weds morning, and by evening time same day, I'll touch down at Sydney. I would have wanted to take the last midnite flight out on SQ, right after my class on Tues nite. But well, price is not right. Air tix costs some 300+ more at least. Oh well. I'll hang around Sydney on Thurs; we'll pick up the car on Thurs morning, and Friday we'll set off for Gold Coast. We'll be staying in Gold Coast till the subsequent Weds, and drive back to Sydney, and spend the rest of the days there till I fly back to Singapore on Sunday. It's my one week vacation, that's why I've got no classes. One and a half weeks of bliss. =D

I bought my airtix online, settled my visa, changed my currency...what's left is to pack my bag now. But before that, I would need to come up with a list of the stuff to bring. I can already foresee myself frantically doing my packing on Tues nite till the wee hours of the morning. Sigh.

But when I come back to spore, it'll be hell. I would have one assignment and one research presentation due. Sigh. So Sao Xing rite =\

Talking about projects...introducing one of my modules' group members!

Jac and myself, well we know each other through work already (she's my client). I'm glad to have her with me in the course. She motivates and pushes the lazy me. haha

Well, we were supposed to form a group of four, and the two "anti-social" girls found this pair of guys who didn't have any other members to form a group with too. They "miao-ed" us while we were unsure if they were "available" still. In any case, we formed a group, and soon hit it off. It's kinda like, we "wu suo bu tan" now *grin* It's a nice bunch of friends, really. No competitiveness, no jealousy, no rivalry. We were giving and ready to lend a helping hand whenever needed. I'm glad and fortunate that my first group members in NTU are this wacky and fun bunch. *wide grin*

Oh I snatched the photo from Ben's blog. Wahaha. He even bothered to name us. Haa. He even wrote an entry about us. How honoured. Heh. Read his entry here, entitled "in a himbo mode". We were having a group discussion in Bugis National Library Children's Section (now termed Kiddy Land, no thanks to Ben too..Haha), and he suddenly stood up and snapped a photo. Only Eugene looked at him. I was well...shy. Hee.

My turn to do an introduction on my group members. If you found Eugene familiar, that's course he's the host for the current affairs programme on channel 8 "Frontline" aka qian xian zhui zong. Ming ren ye...hahaha. Ben works at Republic Poly, Corp Comms. An engineer by training, he started with RP's HR actually. Interesting mix eh. Jac...dun need say liao lah. Hahaha..me and you so shou liao hoh =)

Alrite..will keep it short here. More next time then. Though I dunno how long the next entry will take me to pen. Haa. Ciao.

New Year's Eve Party Photos

Gonna do a short post here today. Managed to put together a quick montage of shots, and these were taken...erm, heh.. abit paiseh to say even...earlier this year, during the new year's eve party...wahahaha! Yah I know what a slacker I am. Alright here goes:

Waiting for Time to Pass

Hmm..dunno why, just suddenly have the urge to do an entry now. Kinda strange, coz I'm like at work now loh. Haha. Guess maybe it's coz the day is draggy and long, taking forever to end. -.- After some loooong wait, finally it's 5.15pm now. Today is one of those days when you look at the clock, it's 3pm; you do a whole load of things, take another look at the clock, it's 3.10pm. -.-''

I was in a pissed mood just now...and aggravated by the fact that some frens just chose the right moment to step on my toes. Eg, Adrian. He super one kind...Ok, he started out of concern, no doubt. He msned me, asking me how's my day, and my reply was "busy, draggy, can't wait for it to end..so not very good mood". And you know what that idiot (yes Adrian you are an idiot) had to say? "Why? Period coming?" Can someone, anyone, please enlighten me why issit that guys have to assume it's our menses causing hormonal inbalance, and thereby wrecking havoc in our moods? Ok fine, granted, that is a scientific-fact, I'm not arguing against that. What I have a grouse with is, why do you have to assume that as the cause of the first inkling of trouble?

I mean, when guys fly into a non-explicable rage, nobody goes "Why? Hormonal inbalance?" or "Raging hormones? Didn't get what you want?" -.- I know, that sounds kinda crude. But crap. That's what I mean loh. I'm not trying to suggest anything feministic here...but doesn't it sound kinda discriminatory or smthg? I dunno..I can't put a finger on it..just doesn't feel good abt it. Felt kinda mis-understood or misplaced. Sigh. Anyways. Adrian u pig.

Hmm...let's see, some good news =) Our dear Isabel may very well soon be on her way to snaggin her new guy loh. Hee. This fellow is her friend whom she's known for a long time. Kinda like my situation. =) They've known each other for coming to 10 years (me and J coming to 11 yrs..hee). I'm happy for her. I believe (just as she does) that she will be happier with this guy. We have our reasons, and we happen to concur =) Oh he happens to be a J too. Heh. Well, give them a couple of months, they'll probably get hitched (bf-gf) very soon. Who knows, we may even go shopping for V-day prezzie together next year =D Wishing her the best. =) She'll be graduating from her school soon..Means once school's out, she'll revert back to her normal work hours..and lunch sessions with her will resume soon *grin*

Argh! Look! Look! This is what I mean loh...in the midst of my doing work and blogging, albeit short entry...it's only 5.40pm now!! Time absolutely craaaaaawwwwls!!! I hate today. I hate now.

Sat Nite @ Zouk

I haven't had such fun in a long time =) So does that mean I have a boring life, or boring frens? *ponders* Coz the last time I went St James was rather boring. Pauline and I agreed that it must have been the crowd we went with. The music's good at Zouk, I must add. Citibank card got me in for free, the guys bought the drinks. Haha..

Pauline asked me out to zouk last night; was organised by Jocelyn. Apart from her and Jocelyn, I didn't know who else was going or how big the group would be. But well, when it comes to Jocelyn, we can always trust her to jio her different grps of frens together. But me n my big mouth - I didn't know that she had broken up wf her bf recently, and well...u know, I shoot my mouth off. Haiz. Of coz she didn't blame me =) But well, I still felt bad. Then again, with the hoards of guys swarming around her..haha. Let's just say she has no lack of suitors. *grin*

Seems that the bunch was pretty much acquainted actually, initially I kinda felt a little odd. But well, it soon passed and we were rather acquainted after a while. Sua ku as I am, I learnt to play the fav guessing game that seemed to be many ppl's alcohol companion. As usual I couldn't drink much lest the allergy monster attacks...so I got a fren to drink for me if I lost. =p Well, he gallantly offered and I did thank him. Haha.

Coincidentally, Adrian was supposed to meet his friends at Zouk too, and while my frens have all reached, his hadn't, so he joined me and my friends first. Albeit paiseh to say, that was my first time at Zouk in my 26 yrs. What? I'm a guai guai girl ok. Heh. Anyways, everyone drank, played their stuff, talked, then decided to hit the dance floor. And fyi, I can't dance for nuts. I've got two left feet. So I felt kinda awkward being there too. Esp when the gang got high, and started dancing. I mean, really dancing. But they don't want to leave me at the table alone, so...yeah.

Anyways, I was just swaying and stuff, then this guy came along and asked if he could know me. I was a little surprised, coz from what I could tell, this chap is young, definitely younger than I am. I found out that he was serving his NS, is 20 this year. And interestingly, he thot I was still studying. Haha...I look THAT young huh? *Ahem* heh...

It definitely turned out to be an interesting nite. I mean, to begin with, I wasn't THAT keen to go, knowing that I probably wouldn't know more than half the peeps in the group, but well, I thot anything beats mopping at home. And the next thing I know when I'm there, I have guys vying for my attention. THree, may I add. Heh. It is flattering, I must say.

But one of them...well he's kinda irritating. He tried to take advantage of me, touching my face on the pretext of "feeling how flushed he is". Initially, I thot he was being friendly, when I saw him touching my other frens. I siam, but one time I couldn't siam fast enuff. Yeah, he did it more than one time loh. He touched my cheek, and I got really pissed. I told him off, not fierce, but definitely not polite. I made it clear to him not to touch me again. He tried to laugh it off as an innocent thing, but I tink the look on my face must hv said quite a fair bit. He didn't try to do anythign subsequently. Initially he tried to come close while we were on the dance floor, but thank god for Pauline and Jocelyn and Adrian - I used them as shields. Heh.

Another one, I'm smart enough to know that he was interested. Ha..so I siamed him. I just acted blur, moving out of his way "unknowingly" whenever he tries to come by...talking to Pauline and Jocelyn whenever he tries to strike a conversation. True enough, Pauline told me later that the reason why she intro-ed us was coz he told her he wanted to know me.

But well...I didn't go out of boundary. I do remember the ring resting on my fourth finger, I do know that my heart has no room for others =)

Some photos...

It's exasperating how sometimes when you want something so much, and yet you don't get it, or it doesn't happen...And just when you don't expect anything, something creeps up..and sometimes not one, but two, or even three at that. And you end up being at a loss, not sure what to do next, unsure if your next decision would be a right one. Anyways, I'm just grousing.

I went to cover an event yesterday (Sat) at PSA club. It was organised for the Myanmese, who were actually celebrating their new year. But woah...it was a super duper testorone-charged event loh...I was like, the 1% female amongst the 99% males there. There were hundreds of them...thankfully, they arent really out of hand or anything. They were quite polite in fact.

Anyways, the event ended late. I was supposed to join Pauline at her club for some steam spa thingy at about 6, but by the time I reached home to drop the camera first (can't expect me to lug that bulky & expensive thing around), it was already 730. I only had enuff time to freshen up a little before going out again to meet her. And knowing her, she had another female fren with her. SHe likes to bring her different groups of frens together, which is perfectly fine with me, so long as her frens are nice and not snobbish or wicked u noe...so far, her frens are really nice ppl. =) The last time we went St James, she invited her fren, who brought her boyfriend, who went there to meet another group of 10. Haha.

Well anyways, this time, her fren invited another of her fren along too. By the time we met, it was almost 10, and we went for dinner. And on the spur of the moment, we went ktv after that. Now, because Im a bad singer, I'm shy to sing in front of ppl, unless its the usual grp of ppl Im used to, aka, office ppl; siblings..

So yesterday was the first time I actually went ktv with a new group...a small, but 'stranger' group. And they all have good voices loh..sigh. So well...I had the feeling that there was an intention that Joscelyn, Pauline's fren, brought her fren (name's Fabian) along to matchmake him or something. And I became their target, which was really strange! I mean...ok, Joscelyn is a really super nice girl, and though I could get along with her as if we were like old pals, fact is, I had only known her like 4hrs at best? Haha..so it's kinda funny to have a 'stranger' matchmake me and her fren. Kinda amusing actually, I must say. Heh...

I had a little 'scare' the last time I went out with Pauline. It was supposed to be movie date for both of us, but she ended up bringing a male fren along. Knowing my good fren, I was rather sure she brought him out to let me 'assess'. Her male fren (Kevin) brought his guy fren along, and it ended up a double date. -.- WHich is perfectly alright with me, really. So of course, I grilled her and she told me she does fancy this guy, but she's getting mixed signals from him. Hmm...

The real 'scare' was not the double date, obviously. It was what happened after that. The next time I met up with Pauline for dinner, (a couple of days later), I asked her for her low-down on Kevin (which she hadn't told me as yet). And after her story, she told me what transpassed between the two of them when they met up for an event the next day after the movie. Basically, he asked her about me, and the stuff we do. *!!!* I felt so super bad, u noe! At one point, she even thought he was going to ask her for my number. Gracious me...I was so scared that she would befriend me or something. I assured her that he was probably being polite about asking the stuff we did together. For all we know, he actually is after info about her or her lifestyle, yeah? Of course, I didnt give her unnecessary false hopes too. It was also based on the other stuff that she told me earlier.

Anyways...she assured me that she wouldn't fall out with me over a guy, unless of course, I did stuff on purpose. SHe would, in fact, be thankful that she knew whether the guy was interested in her or otherwise. Of course she would be broken-hearted too. I just hope she wouldn't think I'm out to snatch guys with her or something...and her guy at that...Oh well.

Anyways...some long overdue photos. More in the process of editing...but here are some first. Notice how we are all in black? Well it's coincidental =)

Not sure if I had mentioned before that I bruise super easily? Well, this outing was the time when I went home to discover two mysterious fingerprint bruises on my arm. As you would see from the pictures, I was wearing long-sleeved blouse, so I didnt know about the bruises till I got home and was in the shower. I was cold right down to the core upon noticing it. I was sure nobody had grabbed me or anything. *shudder* heh...